Gaslighting: Seeing Clearly Through the Fog

 “The Lord is near to all who call upon Him,
to all who call upon Him in truth.” — Psalm 145:18

1. What Is Gaslighting? The word gaslighting has become one of the most overused terms in recent years. Many now use it to describe any disagreement, correction, or uncomfortable truth. But true gaslighting is far deeper—and far more destructive

Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation where someone intentionally distorts reality to make another person doubt their own perception, memory, or sanity. The goal is control—keeping the victim dependent, confused, and unsure of themselves.

It’s not simply disagreeing. It’s when someone denies facts, rewrites history, twists your words, or makes you question what’s true. Over time, the victim begins to wonder, “Maybe I am overreacting… maybe it really is my fault.”

2. Who Gaslights and Why? Gaslighting is often used by individuals with deep insecurity, pride, or narcissistic traits. The person may fear losing control, being exposed, or being held accountable for their behavior.

Gaslighting can happen in:

• Abusive relationships (romantic, family, or friendships)
• Work or ministry environments where power is misused
• Spiritual abuse, where Scripture is twisted to shame or silence someone

Jesus encountered gaslighting, too. The Pharisees constantly tried to distort truth, accuse Him of things He didn’t do, and make Him question His identity: “If You are the Son of God…” (Matthew 4:6). The enemy uses the same tactics today—to erode confidence, silence truth, and isolate hearts from God’s peace.

3. How to Discern When It’s HappeningGaslighting often happens subtly, drip by drip. Here are some signs:

• You feel constantly confused, anxious, or “on edge.”
• You apologize often, even when you’re not sure what you did wrong.
• You second-guess your memory or feelings.
• You feel like you can’t “win” no matter what you do.
• You leave conversations feeling smaller, ashamed, or crazy.

If this sounds familiar, pause and bring it before the Lord. Ask Him for discernment: 

“Lord, show me truth. Reveal where deception has taken root. Teach me to see clearly again.”

God’s Spirit always leads us into truth (John 16:13). The enemy, by contrast, is the “father of lies” (John 8:44).

4. The Effects of GaslightingGaslighting can leave deep emotional wounds:

• Loss of confidence and self-trust
• Chronic anxiety or depression
• Difficulty making decisions
• Isolation from supportive people
• Shame and confusion about your worth

This confusion is spiritual warfare. The enemy loves to use distorted truth to keep God’s children bound in fear and silence. But Jesus came to set captives free (Luke 4:18).

5. Healing from GaslightingHealing begins with truth. Jesus said, “You shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free” (John 8:32).

Steps toward healing in Christ:

1. Come back to the truth of God’s Word. It restores your identity and reality.
   “The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear?” — Psalm 27:1
2. Seek safe, godly counsel. Talk with a trusted pastor, counselor, or support group who understands emotional abuse.
3. Set firm boundaries. Scripture calls us to “guard our hearts” (Proverbs 4:23). Healthy boundaries are not unloving—they’re wise and biblical.
4. Invite Jesus into the memories. Let Him show you what was true and what was distorted.
5. Forgive—but with discernment. Forgiveness releases you from bondage. It doesn’t require reconciliation with someone unrepentant or unsafe.

As you walk with Christ, you’ll begin to see clearly again. The fog of confusion lifts, and His Spirit restores peace and confidence in His truth.

6. A Closing Word of Hope If you’ve been gaslighted,
​You are not crazy. You are not too sensitive. You are not broken beyond repair.
God sees you. He knows the truth of what happened, even when others deny it.
He is your Defender, your Witness, your Healer.

“He will bring forth your righteousness as the light,
and your justice as the noonday.” — Psalm 37:6

You don’t have to fight for your truth—just stand in it.
Christ will restore what manipulation tried to destroy.

Reflection Questions

• Have you ever doubted your reality because someone constantly dismissed or twisted it?
• How can you anchor yourself in the truth of God’s Word this week?
• Who can you safely talk to about what you’re experiencing?

Need help breaking free?
We offer trauma-informed, Christ-centered counseling through The Balm of Gilead Ministries. You don’t have to navigate this alone. Reach out. We’re here to walk with you.

Christ Centered Counseling - THE BALM OF GILEAD MINISTRIES